The Occasional's Audio Book Series: Tuesdays With Morrie

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Listen to more from the The Occasional's Audio Book Series:

MORPHS: Here's What These Super Hero Stars Looked Like When They Were Younger

The appearances of the actors portraying iconic superheroes are locked into our minds, as they, themselves, became synonymous with the character. But what did they look like when they were just fresh faces, before they even had donned a cape?

Slide the pegs below to watch the heroic become younger.

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Christian Bale

 

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Robert Downey Junior

 

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Hugh Jackman

 

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Halle Berry

 

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Chris Hemsworth

 

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Mark Ruffalo

 

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Chris Evans

 

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Scarlett Johansson

 

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Toby Maguire

 

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Christopher Reeve

 

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See More Morphs:

An Annotated Breakdown of Enrique Iglesias' "Hero"

In the spirit of Rap Genius, we bring you a thorough analysis of a classic. 
 

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CLICK ON THE HIGHLIGHTED LYRICS BELOW FOR ANNOTATION

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"Hero" by Enrique Iglesias

THIS FIRST LINE, WHISPERED BY IGLESIAS, SETS THE TONE FOR THE REST OF THE SONG AND SUBTLY HINTS WHAT IT WILL BE ABOUT. IN THIS CASE, THE SONG IS ABOUT WANTING TO BE YOUR HERO.

AN HOMAGE TO IGLESIAS' FAVORITE COMEDY ANIMAL HOUSE, IN WHICH A THREATENING AFRICAN AMERICAN MAN ASKS PETER RIEGART'S CHARACTER, "DO YOU MIND IF WE DANCE WITH YO DATES?"

AFTER A 2003 MOTORCYCLE ACCIDENT, IGLESIAS UNDERWENT A SPINAL FUSION OF THE C2, C3, AND C4 VERTEBRAE. SINCE THEN, WHEN HE IS RUNNING, IT IS LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO LOOK BACK.

PEOPLE WHO BURST INTO TEARS JUST BECAUSE THEY SEE SOMEONE ELSE CRYING HAVE AN EMPATHIC DISORDER THAT CAUSES THEM TO CONFUSE ANOTHER'S EMOTIONS FOR THEIRS.

IGLESIAS WAS RAISED AS A ROMAN CATHOLIC. IN CATHOLICISM, A SOUL CAN BE "SAVED" IF ONE ACCEPTS JESUS CHRIST AS THE SON OF GOD AND ONE'S PERSONAL SAVIOR. BECAUSE IGLESIAS IS ASKING, "WOULD YOU SAVE MY SOUL TONIGHT," IT'S CLEAR THAT HE IS STILL A SINNER YET TO BE SAVED AND AS YET UNWORTHY OF GOD'S LOVE.

IGLESIAS IS TRYING TO DETERMINE IF HE'S GOING TO FREAK THIS GIRL OUT BY SUDDENLY TOUCHING HER LIPS, THOUGH HE MAY JUST BE USING THE QUESTION AS A RHETORICAL DEVICE TO WARN HER, "I AM ABOUT TO TOUCH YOUR LIPS."

THIS IS AN ATTEMPT TO RHYME "LIPS" WITH "THIS."

HE'S REALLY ASKING A LOT OF THIS GIRL.

"INFANTALISM," ALSO KNOWN AS "DIAPER FETISH," IS A PARAPHILIC SEXUAL DESIRE TO BE DRESSED, TREATED, AND CUDDLED LIKE A BABY. IF SHE WANTS TO GET WITH HIM, THIS GIRL IS GOING TO HAVE TO PUT IGLESIAS IN A DIAPER, FEED HIM A BOTTLE, HOLD HIM TO HER CHEST, AND SING LULLABIES UNTIL HE ACHIEVES AN ERECTION.

THIS IS THE FIRST MENTION OF THE WORD (AND SONG TITLE) "HERO" SINCE THE FIRST LINE. MOST LIKELY IGLESIAS REALIZED THAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT CATHOLICISM AND DIAPER FETISHES WAY TOO MUCH AND NEEDED TO GET BACK ON MESSAGE.

THIS DOESN'T ACTUALLY WORK. HE'S TRYING TO TRICK HER INTO MAKING OUT.

THIS IS A COMMON LINE USED BY STALKERS TO JUSTIFY THEIR CRIMINAL BEHAVIOR. OTHER SIMILAR STATEMENTS INCLUDE "WE'RE GOING TO BE TOGETHER FOREVER" AND "I'M NEVER EVER GOING TO LET YOU GO BECAUSE I LOVE YOU TOO MUCH." FLORIDA — WHERE IGLESIAS WAS RAISED — AMENDED ITS STALKING LAWS IN 2012 SPECIFICALLY TO INCLUDE "VERBAL AND NONVERBAL THREATS, INCLUDING THOSE BY ELECTRONIC COMMUNICATION" SUCH AS A POP SONG.

IGLESIAS SEEMS TO BE ASKING IF THE WOMAN WILL VERBALLY ABUSE HIM, WHICH IS A POPULAR FORM OF S&M HUMILIATION PERFORMED BY A DOMINATRIX ON A SUBMISSIVE

OH WAIT, SORRY, I DIDN'T REALIZE HE WASN'T DONE ASKING THE QUESTION.

SOMETIMES GIRLS SWEAR THEY'LL ALWAYS BELONG TO A MAN, BUT OCCASIONALLY THEY DON'T TELL THE TRUTH; THEY JUST SAY THAT TO GET AWAY FROM THE MAN AND THEN "RUN AND HIDE" UNTIL THEY CAN ALERT THE AUTHORITES THAT A MAN IS DEMANDING THEY BECOME HIS PROPERTY.

IGLESIAS IS LITERALLY ASKING, "AM I TOO EMOTIONALLY INVOLVED IN THIS ROMANCE?" WHILE SUB-TEXTUALLY ASKING, "DO YOU THINK MY PENIS IS GOING TO FIT INSIDE YOUR VAGINA?"

GIRL, YOU MAKE ME FEEL SO CRAZY IT'S CAUSING ALL THIS INTROSPECTION AND SELF-REFLECTION

ACTUALLY, HOLD UP, LET’S JUST DO IT.

GUYS WHO WANT TO SLEEP WITH A WOMAN BUT DON'T HAVE THE COURAGE TO INITIATE OFTEN SAY THINGS LIKE, "WHY DON'T WE JUST GET IN BED AND HUG?" AND THEN THEY KIND OF PRESS THEIR GROINS INTO THE WOMAN'S LOWER BACK/BUTT AND HOPE SHE DOES SOMETHING

IGLESIAS HAS RUN OUT OF IDEAS AT THIS POINT BUT THE SONG NEEDS TO BE A LITTLE LONGER FOR RADIO PLAY, SO HE SINGS THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER.

AND OVER

YEAH, WE GET IT BRO.

Let me be your hero

VERSE 1

Would you dance
If I asked you to dance?
Would you run
And never look back?
Would you cry
If you saw me crying?
And would you save my soul, tonight?
Would you tremble
If I touched your lips?
Would you laugh?
Oh please tell me this.
Now would you die
For the one you loved?
Hold me in your arms, tonight.

CHORUS

I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.

VERSE 2

Would you swear
That you'll always be mine?
Or would you lie?
Would you run and hide?
Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
I don't care…
You're here tonight.
CHORUS

I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.

BRIDGE

Oh, I just want to hold you.
I just want to hold you, oh, yeah.
Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
Well, I don't care...
You're here tonight.

I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain, oh, yeah.
I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.
I can be your hero.
I can kiss away the pain.
And I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.
You can take my breath away.
I can be your hero.

Let me be your hero

THIS FIRST LINE, WHISPERED BY IGLESIAS, SETS THE TONE FOR THE REST OF THE SONG AND SUBTLY HINTS WHAT IT WILL BE ABOUT. IN THIS CASE, THE SONG IS ABOUT WANTING TO BE YOUR HERO.

VERSE 1

Would you dance
If I asked you to dance?

AN HOMAGE TO IGLESIAS' FAVORITE COMEDY ANIMAL HOUSE, IN WHICH A THREATENING AFRICAN AMERICAN MAN ASKS PETER RIEGART'S CHARACTER, "DO YOU MIND IF WE DANCE WITH YO DATES?"

Would you run
And never look back?

AFTER A 2003 MOTORCYCLE ACCIDENT, IGLESIAS UNDERWENT A SPINAL FUSION OF THE C2, C3, AND C4 VERTEBRAE. SINCE THEN, WHEN HE IS RUNNING, IT IS LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO LOOK BACK.

Would you cry
If you saw me crying?

PEOPLE WHO BURST INTO TEARS JUST BECAUSE THEY SEE SOMEONE ELSE CRYING HAVE AN EMPATHIC DISORDER THAT CAUSES THEM TO CONFUSE ANOTHER'S EMOTIONS FOR THEIRS.

And would you save my soul, tonight?

IGLESIAS WAS RAISED AS A ROMAN CATHOLIC. IN CATHOLICISM, A SOUL CAN BE "SAVED" IF ONE ACCEPTS JESUS CHRIST AS THE SON OF GOD AND ONE'S PERSONAL SAVIOR. BECAUSE IGLESIAS IS ASKING, "WOULD YOU SAVE MY SOUL TONIGHT," IT'S CLEAR THAT HE IS STILL A SINNER YET TO BE SAVED AND AS YET UNWORTHY OF GOD'S LOVE.

Would you tremble
If I touched your lips?

IGLESIAS IS TRYING TO DETERMINE IF HE'S GOING TO FREAK THIS GIRL OUT BY SUDDENLY TOUCHING HER LIPS, THOUGH HE MAY JUST BE USING THE QUESTION AS A RHETORICAL DEVICE TO WARN HER, "I AM ABOUT TO TOUCH YOUR LIPS."

Would you laugh?
Oh please tell me this.

THIS IS AN ATTEMPT TO RHYME "LIPS" WITH "THIS."

Now would you die
For the one you loved?

HE'S REALLY ASKING A LOT OF THIS GIRL.

Hold me in your arms, tonight.

"INFANTALISM," ALSO KNOWN AS "DIAPER FETISH," IS A PARAPHILIC SEXUAL DESIRE TO BE DRESSED, TREATED, AND CUDDLED LIKE A BABY. IF SHE WANTS TO GET WITH HIM, THIS GIRL IS GOING TO HAVE TO PUT IGLESIAS IN A DIAPER, FEED HIM A BOTTLE, HOLD HIM TO HER CHEST, AND SING LULLABIES UNTIL HE ACHIEVES AN ERECTION.

CHORUS

I can be your hero, baby.

THIS IS THE FIRST MENTION OF THE WORD (AND SONG TITLE) "HERO" SINCE THE FIRST LINE. MOST LIKELY IGLESIAS REALIZED THAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT CATHOLICISM AND DIAPER FETISHES WAY TOO MUCH AND NEEDED TO GET BACK ON MESSAGE.

I can kiss away the pain.

THIS DOESN'T ACTUALLY WORK. HE'S TRYING TO TRICK HER INTO MAKING OUT.

I will stand by you forever.

THIS IS A COMMON LINE USED BY STALKERS TO JUSTIFY THEIR CRIMINAL BEHAVIOR. OTHER SIMILAR STATEMENTS INCLUDE "WE'RE GOING TO BE TOGETHER FOREVER" AND "I'M NEVER EVER GOING TO LET YOU GO BECAUSE I LOVE YOU TOO MUCH." FLORIDA — WHERE IGLESIAS WAS RAISED — AMENDED ITS STALKING LAWS IN 2012 SPECIFICALLY TO INCLUDE "VERBAL AND NONVERBAL THREATS, INCLUDING THOSE BY ELECTRONIC COMMUNICATION" SUCH AS A POP SONG.

You can take my breath away.

VERSE 2

Would you swear

IGLESIAS SEEMS TO BE ASKING IF THE WOMAN WILL VERBALLY ABUSE HIM, WHICH IS A POPULAR FORM OF S&M HUMILIATION PERFORMED BY A DOMINATRIX ON A SUBMISSIVE.

That you'll always be mine?

OH WAIT, SORRY, I DIDN'T REALIZE HE WASN'T DONE ASKING THE QUESTION.

Or would you lie?
Would you run and hide?

SOMETIMES GIRLS SWEAR THEY'LL ALWAYS BELONG TO A MAN, BUT OCCASIONALLY THEY DON'T TELL THE TRUTH; THEY JUST SAY THAT TO GET AWAY FROM THE MAN AND THEN "RUN AND HIDE" UNTIL THEY CAN ALERT THE AUTHORITES THAT A MAN IS DEMANDING THEY BECOME HIS PROPERTY.

Am I in too deep?

IGLESIAS IS LITERALLY ASKING, "AM I TOO EMOTIONALLY INVOLVED IN THIS ROMANCE?" WHILE SUB-TEXTUALLY ASKING, "DO YOU THINK MY PENIS IS GOING TO FIT INSIDE YOUR VAGINA?"

Have I lost my mind?

GIRL, YOU MAKE ME FEEL SO CRAZY IT'S CAUSING ALL THIS INTROSPECTION AND SELF-REFLECTION.

I don't care…
You're here tonight.

ACTUALLY, HOLD UP, LET’S JUST DO IT.

CHORUS

I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain.
I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.

BRIDGE

Oh, I just want to hold you.
I just want to hold you, oh, yeah.

GUYS WHO WANT TO SLEEP WITH A WOMAN BUT DON'T HAVE THE COURAGE TO INITIATE OFTEN SAY THINGS LIKE, "WHY DON'T WE JUST GET IN BED AND HUG?" AND THEN THEY KIND OF PRESS THEIR GROINS INTO THE WOMAN'S LOWER BACK/BUTT AND HOPE SHE DOES SOMETHING.

Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
Well, I don't care...
You're here tonight.

I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain, oh, yeah.
I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.

IGLESIAS HAS RUN OUT OF IDEAS AT THIS POINT BUT THE SONG NEEDS TO BE A LITTLE LONGER FOR RADIO PLAY, SO HE SINGS THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER.

I can be your hero.
I can kiss away the pain.
And I will stand by you forever.
You can take my breath away.

AND OVER

You can take my breath away.

AND OVER

I can be your hero.

YEAH, WE GET IT BRO.