The Occasional's Guide to Voting

A How-To with Andy Richter

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Remember the old days of pulling a lever to cast your vote? Of course you don't! That was a dumb time that only old people lived through! We're young and our time is precious, which is why the government made it easy for us to choose politicians by marking a ballot and scanning it into a computer. But for the few of you who have never felt the ecstasy of participating in our democracy, Andy Richter is here to show you how to take part in the 2012 election.

Step 1

Carefully study the candidates and decide who you feel will best lead the nation. Today's the day you vote for President.

Step 2

Check in to your polling site by providing proper identification. 

Step 3

Step into the booth, close the curtain, and prepare to fulfill your duty as an American.

Step 4

Go over your decision one last time. Remember, this vote directly impacts the fate of America.  

Step 5

On your ballot, find the name of the candidate you wish to vote for

Step 6

Confidently make your selection by filling in your ballot with the pen provided.

Step 7

Exit the voting booth with your ballot in hand.

Step 8

Find one of the many scanners outside the booth and insert your ballot. Don't worry. This seems tricky, but a volunteer will assist you.

Step 9

Congratulations. By casting your vote, you have played an essential part in the political process.

Step 10

That night, turn on the news to see who won the general election. 

Step 11

After four years, prepare to do your part as an American all over again. It's democracy in action. 

This article was originally published October 2012